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So You Want To Kill Thanos: A Hero's Guide to an Intergalactic Genocidal Maniac

So you want to destroy Thanos... Congratulations! You’re about to attempt a task that so many in the world have tried and so few have completed. Whether you’re an enslaved captive after he destroyed your world, or a superhero hell-bent on saving the galaxy, let this article be your guide to the ins and outs of the forsaken son of destruction. Before learning his weaknesses, however, it’s important you know how he came to be, and how he grew into one of the most feared names in the galaxy.

 


The Beginning

Cursed from birth by The Celestials, Thanos was born to the parents A’Lars and Sui-San. His brother Eros was handsome and fun loving, while Thanos was born with deviant syndrome, a mutation that gave him gray skin and a massive body frame. An outcast from birth, Thanos harbored a lot of resentment and anger towards those who looked normal around him. He became obsessed with the concept of death and began conditioning his body until he was sure he had become stronger than all the inhabitants of his home world Titan.

Now matured, Thanos would leave his home world on a stolen ship. A hundred years later, Thanos would return with an army and a love for Death, literally Death. Thanos had met the embodiment of Death and in an attempt to woo her, attacked his own world. Many were killed including Thanos’ mother, Sui-San. After a long fought battle, Thanos conquered Titan, and from there began his reign of terror upon the galaxy.

Thanos' one true love is Death. He fights, conquers, and destroys primarily to attain her love and affection. Death is a cruel mistress, however, and throughout history Thanos has failed her time and time again.

 


Powers and Abilities

How do you stop a being who unmercifully killed his own mother? Whose nihilist personality has led to the destruction of numerous planets and conquering of millions? It’s no easy task to defeat Thanos. In fact, he once took on a bulk of the Marvel universe, Galactus, and several other god-like entities and still won. Can Thanos be defeated?

If you are trying to outmatch Thanos on a physical level, you will fail. His official strength chart is unknown, but he has been seen knocking The Hulk back a considerable distance with a punch to the face. If he needs more power he can always channel it internally and create more where there is none. His stamina is limitless as a perk to his Deviant body not producing any lactic acid, and his speed is comparable to the fastest human athlete.

Like all Eternals, he is ageless, unable to be affected by disease or infection, and for a moment was banned from dying by Death herself. The ban has since been lifted, but it should be evident by now that killing Thanos is no easy task.

His intelligence and psychic abilities are unmatched, and his willingness to do anything for power are perhaps his greatest assets. His powers of telepathy have been known to transcend dimensions, and his technological innovation is eras above current human achievement. Mind you, this is all before he acquires intergalactic aid. When he possesses either the Cosmic Cube or any of the Infinity Gems, Thanos is unstoppable.

 


How To Stop Thanos

If Thanos were to have any weakness, it would be his pride and self doubt. Thanos has been plagued with the ability to attain and achieve all the power he could ever want, only to lose it in a moment of arrogance or uncaring. All his losses have come from underestimating his opponents or becoming careless in his powerful states... well he was arrested once in the 60’s, but that was a weird time.

Other ways Thanos has been defeated include but are not limited to:

  • Believing he drained the Cosmic Cube of its power and discarding it
  • Being turned to stone but left with a fragment of consciousness
  • Having the Infinity Gauntlet ripped from his hand
  • Being trapped in a pocket dimension or other galaxies
  • Being punched through the chest by Drax The Destroyer

In a fight against Thanos, you must prepare for war. There will be death, there will be blood, and people you love will die. After giving it all you’ve got, there is still no guarantee you will succeed. Good luck, however, brave warrior. May you succeed where so many others have failed.

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