I wish I made the title of this article, "Scorcese producing Jackie Chan in Will You Be My Black Friend?" It would have been funny, but a lie nevertheless. So I just won't do it. I won't even joke around about doing it. Let alone make the entire opening paragraph of this article an explanation of why I will not do it. That would just be wrong and insensitive to you, our loyal readers, if I dragged it out. I will not waste your valuable and precious... precious... precious time.
Lionsgate and Oprah Winfrey's Harpo Films have tapped Chris Rock to star in Will You Be My Black Friend? The film is not to be confused with the Dora The Explorer episode, "Once you go Black, usted nunca Vuelve."
The film will be based off of the recently acquired November 2008 GQ Magazine article “Will You Be My Black Friend?” a humorous account by senior correspondent Devin Friedman about his clumsy attempt to make friends with people of color. Hi there, nice to meet you.
Here's a summary of the article, I will translate the PC terms into ones we can all understand:
Following a cocktail party epiphany(dude was DRUNK!) that his entire social circle is the same color as he, the white(non-black) writer made an unabashed attempt to make black friends(gain street cred), down to soliciting prospective pals(homies) in a Craigslist ad(lawsuit waiting to happen). In the end(after a while) he discovers that race aside, it is very difficult to make meaningful(athletically superior/well endowed) friends later in life.
Black Friend will be produced by Winfrey, her Harpo Films president Kate Forte and senior V.P. Carla Gardini.
Lionsgate president Michael Paseornek said of the Article:
The cinematic potential of `Will You Be My Black Friend?’ jumped out at us immediately. What really makes the piece special is Devin’s voice, which is honest, astute and extremely funny.
He added of their freshly tapped star:
We can’t imagine a better actor to help bring this story to life than Chris Rock.
He then added:
He's black right?
No! He didn't say that last one. But it'd be funny if he did. But I won't even joke around about that. Let alone make the entire last paragraph about not joking about it. That would be a complete waste of typing. I might as well just slam my head on the keyboard... tgvgviuilydbrpinudaw.