5 Insanely Bizarre Products Of Disney Fandom
They say for everything that exists in the world there is a complete opposite that exists. In the spirit of that, I took one of the happiest companies on Earth, Disney, and unearthed some of the most disgusting and depraved things that have spawned from its brand. Be warned: this post is gonna get weird...real weird.
Goofykin
This is one of those things where it could completely be a troll, but what does that matter? You found costumes, dressed up as Goofy, and filmed an incredibly long fan video for a prank?! This guy haunted the internet for a bit when he first appeared in a 4Chan thread. A lot of the stuff is harder to find since this is kind of old, but he had a ton of photos and implied that he was sexually aroused by the thought of making love to other Goofys.
Russian Cult That Worships "Gadget" From Rescue Rangers...
This is a bit of a weird one for me because as a kid I thought Gadget Hackwrench was one of the most beautiful mouse women I had ever seen. That being said I had no inclination to worship her. There is a cult in Russia, however, that does exactly that. Oddity Central did a piece on these guys and when asked about their love the worshippers had this to say...
“She is the divine being, the most untouched and perfect sibling of the great God on Earth.” "Why I love her? It’s a stupid question, how could I not love the Goddess?” “She is strict, cute, optimistic and her level of technical knowledge is unachievable for a mortal being."
Disney Princess Sex Fan Fiction
It's one of those things you wouldn't think exists because you've never thought "Hm, I wonder if anyone has ever written about a Disney princess getting it on." I never thought of it until I started writing this post...
Don't ever google it.
What you'll find is some of the most depraved, over the top and insane sexual literature there is...
Just to give you a taste, here's an excerpt from "The Not So Little Mermaid'" in which Ariel eats spinach to get really big muscles and fight Ursula and in the process really arouses Prince Eric.
Ariel would eat more of that sea spinach and give Eric the most sensual and sexual thrill rides of his life. She loved to show off her rippling muscles and ripping gigantic boulders from their foundations and holding them over her head with one hand. She even went so far as lifting the ship itself with Eric on it. It felt so good to exert her incredible strength like this. She would also turn into mermaid form and with Eric on their ship, she'd use her spinach enhanced strength to push the ship across the waters as fast as a modern day speed boat.
Unfortunately, when Eric tried to eat the spinach, he found out it didn't work on him. Turns out it only works on those with mermaid blood in them. And even when in human form, Ariel would always have mermaid blood. But he didn't mind.
And the two lived deliriously happily ever after!
This doesn't even scratch the surface of the weird s*** I found. The craziest part? Most of it is surprisingly well-written.
People Who Believe Disney Is The Devil Or Illuminati
Of course how could we forget the group who believes Disney was created as a vessel to promote Satanism to children? There's actually a much larger community discussing this than you think. Sites range from showing hidden dongs in child's imagery to the subtle Illuminati imagery supposedly found around their theme parks. An often cited source is a classic Donald Duck cartoon in which he learns the story of Pythagoras, who is believed by some to be the father of the Illuminati.
People Obsessed With Going To Disneyland On MDMA Or Acid
This is a bit of a newer one but it's all over the web here lately. Scores of people are either talking about or learning about how to get into Disneyland with drugs just so they can trip out inside the park. One crazy rumor is that if park security finds you under the influence, they'll throw you in Disney jail. Disney jail does exist apparently, and may or may not have pictures of every Disney character frowning at you on its walls.