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5 Things you Hope Christopher Nolan Knows About Bane

"Red eyes, full hearts, can't lose."

It goes without saying that after the critical acclaim of The Dark Knight, the geek tribunal has lofty ambitions for Christopher Nolan's final installment in the Batman series. Having scoured the underbelly of the internet for commentary, I've compiled a list of the top 5 things dedicated fans to the Batman hope Mr. Nolan took into consideration when creating this future record grossing bit of film.

5. He is not a homemaker...and he can speak.


If there's one thing Joel Schumacher would say to Nolan entering this movie it would most certainly be, "Don't F$%& it up." If there was one person who really misunderstood Bane/the Batman series, it was him. Being a wordless, green, grunting buffoon through the entirety of the film is far from Bane's style, however the film did teach us that Batman is prepared in any situation...

4. He was OG since Day 1.

Forced to serve his father's life sentence in prison alongside his mother...Bane was raised in within the prison walls of Peña Duro. There he learned to fight, educate himself, and even murder someone with a knife he hid in his teddy bear at the age of 8 (something we can all relate to). Surviving all the way until adulthood, Bane was a legend amongst the convicts. The warden, fearing Banes hold of power was greater than his, signed him up as a test subject for an experimental drug called "Venom",and thus, Bane was born.

3. Bane is as brilliant a tactician as Batman.

Bane may have been prison raised, but that doesn't mean he's some brainless goon. While locked up, Bane received a formal education from a Jesuit priest and read any book he could find (a lot of Readers Digest I'm guessing). Take that and years of fighting skills and Bane is able to dissect his opponents like a frog in middle school Science class. He is, to date, the only villain to have "broken the Bat" when he released all of Gotham's villains then broke an exhausted Batman's back in an epic duel in the bat-cave, oh and did I mention it only took him a year to figure out Batman's identity? I guess to sum it up...he ain't no slouch, so don't treat him like one Chris.

2. The 'Venom' makes him stronger, but he's plenty stronger than Batman on his own.

Bane has accomplished many feats of strength...he has bent steel frames, choke slammed humans like rag-dolls, heck he even broke both of Killer Croc's arms, but none of that would be possible without...WAIT HE DID THAT WITHOUT VENOM?! Believe it, Bane is a super strong behemoth without the junk and could best Batman in a flexing competition any day...I guess he just feels cooler when the "Black Magic" allows him to throw semi-trucks and such.

1. He's really not all that bad of a guy.

"Bat Bro's"

Even in the beginning Bane really didn't have any devious motivation in defeating Batman, he simply knew what had only been instilled in him in a lifetime of prison...fear ruled. In defeating Batman, Bane would have the respect and fear of Gotham and that's why he did it, pure and simple.

After that blew over and Mr. Wayne's spinal column fused back together it was all good! Bane and Batman have fought alongside each other on several occasions, and Bane himself returned to Santa Prisca (his fictional homeland if you're googling right now) and successfully dealt vengeance amongst the drug lords who first distributed Venom...by creating martial law and becoming a dictator and relapsing a couple of times. Okay so he's an anti-hero, but he's not all that bad!

Questions? Comments? You know where to put them...email me at MickJoest@geektyrant.com and tweet me at @MickJoest

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