Mr. Herman (Pee-Wee),
So I saw on Jimmy Fallon last night you did this.
Which got me thinking about this.
Which made me realize through an odd twist of reasoning, rational, and real talk...I want you to be in the next Batman film...as The Riddler! Imagine it Pee-Wee, you as the sleek, green suit, galvanizing around town and causing mayhem with your quirky demeanor and attitude...basically an evil you!
Not your style you might say, but I disagree. Unlike Jim Carrey's representation in Batman Forever, The Riddler it not a psychopathic murderer. Au contraire (pardon my French) my bow tied friend! He is a man of intellect, passion, and mischief! He thwarts his enemies not with his fists, but with his mind, something you Pee-Wee have always been great at. Yes you might need a supporting villain to do the heavy lifting, but I'm sure Warner Bros would drop the cash to see you in the role!
Can I just take a personal aside here and inform you that I am writing you this letter knowing full well the initial choice for Riddler is Leonardo Dicaprio? He wouldn't stand a chance with you in the running! Then again not many can!
Let's face it, Christopher Nolan will not be the last director to reboot Batman and at the rate we saw Spiderman sling back into theaters, it's going to be sooner than later. So now the big question comes, how to get leery fans back in the seats after the greatness thus far? Would you consider it Pee-Wee? The secret word to make us scream is "yes".
Your friend and confidant,