In honor of Fantastic Four's surprising success in the box office and with critics alike, I have decided to create a Movie Dream Team of the kind of Fantastic Four movie I'd like to see...what? I've just been told that Fantastic Four was a huge flop. Well, then this should be a great new idea for a reboot that they should totally take and go with.

Now, before I begin, I do have a few words to say about the Fantastic Four movie. You might have read one of our reviews or rants on this movie on the site. They can be found here if you want to read a critical piece on the filmmaking, and here if you want to see this movie be torn from the inside out while it weeps sadly to itself for not being pretty enough.

All these things aside, I thought the movie was good. No sarcasm. No gotcha. I liked Fantastic Four. I could spend a whole article explaining why I liked it, and what I thought it did right and wrong (it wasn't perfect by any stretch), and why I feel people are giving it a hard time, but I'll just be brief with my thoughts and then get on with the article as a whole. I thought the new Fantastic Four movie took some chances. It wasn't a safe choice. The director made decisions that he thought would make it stand out from the competition, and some of those decisions really paid off and others didn't. In a world where all movies seem to be are "Generic Buff White Man" and "Generic Hot White Woman," this movie made different decisions on casting, villains, story, and tone. It was not your average Disney Marvel movie and it wasn't a DC Cinematic Movie. It was trying to be something else. And I appreciate that. I appreciate a movie trying to be different. It was a breath of fresh air, but like a fly got caught in your throat. The air was still good, it was just that friggin fly that pissed you off. And some people really hate flies. I thought Fantastic Four was edgy and real. But that is an article for another time. Let's get on to my dream Fantastic Four cast.

This was tough, because although I had a dream cast in my mind, the dream cast didn't necessarily fit with the dream movie I wanted, so I had to make sacrifices for who might be the perfect fit in the universe I pictured for this movie and who might fit in the universe that I have known for years. Fantastic Four is a simple enough story in the comics: four people go into space and get powers from cosmic rays. They come back and deal with having those powers. There's the Firey Guy, See Through Lass, RockyDude, and their leader, Professor Stretchy. They fight a guy who has low self esteem and wears a mask, and also they sometimes become pirates. Yeah! Suddenly making a Fantastic Four movie doesn't seem so easy, does it? Maybe you should cut Josh Trank some slack. It's not like he's a bad guy...oh, what's that? He allegedly kinda treated people terribly during the making of the movie? My bad.

The Story

So, for my movie, I decided to keep it unattached to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Not that I have anything against the Marvel Universe, or that it couldn't be attached somehow in later drafts, but I figured this movie should be able to stand on its own. Have the film start out with the characters already having powers. No origin story. Take a look at the 1990's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. They didn't need an origin story. They were turtles, with 'tude. If you really need some sort of exposition, do it with a really quick flashback of Ben Grimm having a nightmare where he relives the spaceship getting filled with cosmic rays and he becomes The Thing. Then have him wake up quickly in fear and go to the bathroom and see himself in the mirror and sigh. Now we know:

1: A basic idea that he wasn't always The Thing and an accident caused the change, and

2: He is unhappy with who he is and what he looks like.

Now we have character motivation and exposition all at once without anyone having to say a damn thing!

So the film picks up with these four super powered people as if they have been living with these powers for a year or so, but they live in hiding. Grimm doesn't really leave the house, and their biggest rule is no one uses their powers outside of the lab. There can be a fun scene where you see an average morning for them using their powers for simple dumb things like cooking eggs, moving a fridge to find a quarter underneath that was dropped, and putting up a force field to stop someone because they forgot something. Don't tell jokes, just show average life with powers. A family with a good dynamic that gets along. Show the connection. Don't make it too goofy, but realistic to how you might abuse your powers. Meanwhile, Reed Richards works on a cure and other science projects. With all this family stuff, many of you are wondering where does the actual story begin. Well, I'm getting there. I just wanted to get some of that other stuff out of the way first that I'd like to see in my movie. Those things are important to me, and they should be important to you too.

So the story would be about Victor Von Doom, a scientist and project financier, planning to unveil a huge science project that will change how the world around us works. It's a device that can re-arrange matter. Doom asks Reed as a friend to come see it and take a look before it's unveiled to make sure nothing goes wrong. Doom has hired a hotshot scientist who has been instrumental in the creation of the device named Owen Reece. As Reed looks over the schematics, he sees a flaw in it that Owen insists isn't a flaw. Doom listens to Reed and delays the unveiling which infuriates Owen. During a late night, Owen decides to sneak into the lab and activate the machine and prove that he's not crazy. It works at first but then malfunctions and the lab blows up. Doom is furious but takes the loss, whereas Reed contemplates the lab explosion, worrying about the possible side effects of the machine's malfunction. He confronts Doom and Doom says to leave it alone. It was a lost cause, and he's moved on to other things. During this whole time, there is probably a sub-plot where we see Thing in a trench coat saving some lady from a thug or helping someone out but then running away because he's scared to be seen. Or maybe Johnny showing off at a bar and Sue coming in to pull him out so they aren't outed.

Now comes the cool part. If anyone saw Watchmen, you certainly know of Dr. Manhattan. (Or Professor Blue-dick, as I like to refer to him.) Imagine someone with immense power collecting his consciousness and physical shape as it's been ripped around the city. Have it be played like a monster movie. Have Owen Reece assembling himself in parts of the city causing anomalies and killing people. Imagine an alleyway. A man is screaming as matter is pulled towards him and he seems to be putting himself together from air particles. A homeless man comes towards him and then gets disassembled and put into him. The being takes the homeless man's coat and walks on.

There are so many things you could do with this set-up. The ideas are flooding with all the scenes one could create! A dark, unstable, godlike being wandering the city killing people, with Doom finding out and trying to cover it up. Doom and Reed being targeted by Reece because they shut him down. The Fantastic Four finally coming to terms with being heroes instead of hiding. Thing coming to terms with not being a freak, but having a purpose. Doom in the end trying to recreate what he started to get these godlike powers and being scarred instead. Don't make Doom the villain. Make him a dark powerful figure who wants to be in control. This is the story of not how the Fantastic Four got their powers and learned to use them, but how they learned to be heroes. This is the story we deserve in a Fantastic Four movie. A scientist and his family taking down an unstable god who can control molecules? The building blocks of life? How awesome would that be?

Director

This is another decision I was torn about. What director could do this movie I have in my head justice? Steven "Friggin" Spielberg. I know he's the go-to choice for most people when you say who's a director you know, but there is a purpose to this. Spielberg can capture the two most important things that I want in my movie better than any other director.

1: Family bonds and character relationships. Spielberg is all about this. Every one of his movies captures relationships better than anything I have seen. Jurassic Park, E.T., Schindler's List! Yes, he's a great director, but moreover, he is a great character director who makes you invested in the people you are watching. This is essential in a Fantastic Four movie. I want to make these character seem real.

2: Suspense. Again, an area in which Spielberg trumps many others. It's rare to find a director who is good at making you love someone and making you genuinely terrified of another. This can be seen in Jaws, Jurassic Park, and even E.T. in some scenes. He knows how to make scary scenes, which is, again, important for this specific movie, because I want Owen Reece to be downright terrifying.

My other choices if I couldn't get Spielberg because he's "busy," would be J.J. Abrams who's just Spielberg Lite, or Stephen Sommers who did The Mummy, a movie that, although cheesy in moments, was very fun. He also did a little movie called Odd Thomas, which if you haven't seen, I suggest you check it out. It's just the right amount of scary and funny.

Cast

For many of these, I looked long and hard to find the perfect choice and ended up on these actors for reasons I'll explain. The biggest thing I looked at is chemistry. I want actors I know can get along with other actors. TV series actors are usually very good at this, and people who I know have a lighter side as well as a darker side.

Mr. Fantastic: Andrew Lincoln

You might know Lincoln from a little show called The Walking Dead. Or if you're like me, you know him from that one Christmas chick flick that I've never seen...maybe. He is a great actor. His intensity in The Walking Dead is great. Both Rick Grimes and Reed Richards have one huge thing in common that Lincoln portrays: he always looks like he carries the world on his back, like the fate of the world lies on his shoulders and it's up to him to save it. Sure, Reed Richards is a nerd, but he is a badass nerd. Have you seen him when he grows out his beard and blasts aliens into smithereens? I could make a solo movie about Reed Richards and it could be rated R and you would watch it because Richards kicks so much ass. You need someone who can be light and funny but still have that long cold look in his eye like everything depends on him. And Lincoln has that look. He has to save the day because no one else can.

The Thing: Vince Vaughn

Before you say this is the worst choice in the world and that I should go die, go watch True Detective season two. Are you done? Pretty good. Not as good as season one. First few episodes were a bit rough, but it picked up in the second half, right? Vaughn is funny which lends itself well to a superhero movie. Plus you never see him, so it's not like as you watch it you're going, "Hey, that's Vince Vaughn." He can do serious. He can do tough guy. He is a surprising choice for The Thing. When I originally was working on this I thought, "Adam Baldwin. Next." But then I realized as much as I love Baldwin in almost everything he does, he is just a hair off for The Thing. And yet Vaughn just seems right. He knows comedy well enough to know when to be funny and when to be serious. He gets family situations and ensemble groups. He can even be heartbreaking in moments. Plus, I'd love to see him work opposite my perfect Johnny Storm.

Human Torch: Zac Efron

Yup. Zefron. Now, it's no mystery that I am a huge Zefron fan, and I almost didn't put him in my cast because I was worried I was being biased, but Zefron would be awesome as the Human Torch. He's hot, funny, and can act like a total dick. Think of Neighbors, now think of the Human Torch. It would just be a lot of that. But now, he has super powers. A world where Zefron is a super hero is a world I want. Plus, he actually can act pretty well. Sure, he's a pretty boy, but he's a talented pretty boy. He has everything you need in a Johnny Storm. Which, as much as I love the character and Zefron, isn't much.

Sue Storm: Diane Kruger

This was such a hard choice. I had it narrowed down to about 30 different actresses who all were just barely not right. Some just didn't have experience, some didn't look right, some were just too...I don't know, just wrong. I finally got it down to Kruger and Rachel McAdams. Once it was down to those two, I just went with Kruger because she looked more Sue Storm-y. Here are the factors I put into this. Has to be a good actress. Diane is a great actress and has proven herself on TV as well as on film. She has to be able to hold her ground as an action star. Did you see Inglourious Basterds? She was great! Also she made the National Treasure movies bearable. Finally, the actress needed to have sisterly instincts. This was a tricky one. I almost gave it to McAdams for this, but I did some digging and saw in interviews Kruger has a friendly, natural feel to her that makes her likeable and almost sisterly.

Victor Von Doom: Mads Mikkelson

Now, realize, this whole movie, Doom is just a guy. Not a supervillain...yet. Mikkelson plays the perfect Hannibal that I think would translate perfectly into Doctor Doom. Plus in Casino Royale, he was equally dark and broody. Mads already plays that role perfectly. He's foreign, attractive, older, dark, and has a camera presence that just screams sinister. He is the only choice for Doom. You would see the evil in his whole performance but you'd never just change him into the supervillain. You'd keep him held back. Let the madness seep from behind his eyes.

Owen Reece: Eddie Redmayne

He's a great actor who a lot of people find attractive, but I want to focus on making him weird. Owen Reece would be this mad character and I want someone who has the chops to go full crazy. Eddie, I believe, has those chops. He would start out as just a kind of goofball, a scientist who wants to be recognized. Maybe he was picked on by the other scientists. Don't go Electro-level with it. Just make him funny and likeable by normal standards, but in the world of super-scientists, he's an outcast. Emphasize the goofiness but make him a real person who wants to be a scientist, but he just isn't as absorbed into it as those other guys. And when he goes crazy, it's because he's been given godlike powers and his mind is still reassembling. He knows some things, but he's trying to remember the rest. He's a teenager with the powers of a god.

So there you go Fox, or Marvel, or whatever studio ends up getting Fantastic Four in the long run: my Fantastic Four movie. Tell me what you think, if there are any changes you'd make, and what other characters you might use.